Oh, my mussels

I really miss the delicious mussels I ate more than a decade ago. It's Chez de Leon on Champ Elysee. I wish I could taste them now! Just send me one pot and that'll be good enough! (Of course, more is better:))

Apart from the vision of mussels in my head, I had a wonderful day today. We finished our presentation with success and Prof Fok recognised our effort by prasing us that we are clever in applying different frameworks to different issues. Bravo! Thank God that all members are nice and kind. You know that I really have had bad experiences in working with "group members", actually that means ME working most of the time! We had lunches and we talked, discussed, shared and laughed. We all enjoy working with one another. I especially appreciate Carly's skills in using the ppt. We just had a great time! I feel very happy today!

Stand Firm at Times of Difficulties

It's really a difficult time for me and honey to cope with. The medicines seem not be able to help honey. I can feel that he's really depressed. Something must have happened but he just wouldn't tell maybe because of face problems.

At such times, I tend to grasp things and people around hoping that they can save us. But the fact is that we are ALL fragile with our own difficulties. The passage I read just now tells me to stand firm:

"The best thing I can do is to stand firm and listen for the Lord’s voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out … they know his voice...Take the time to comfortably lie at the feet of your master, waiting for His instruction. It is often heard in our silence and spoken by a small still voice."

Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still (Exodus 14:13).

13 Moses spoke to the people: "Don't be afraid. Stand firm and watch God do his work of salvation for you today. Take a good look at the Egyptians today for you're never going to see them again. 14 God will fight the battle for you. And you? You keep your mouths shut!" (The Message)

The author called Cliff Young said we can learn a lot from a dog’s loyalty, trustworthiness, and faithfulness to his master. (I hope my Lok-lok is like that!) It all starts by learning to stay, sit, and stand firm.

OK, I'll learn to stand firm and wait.

Session 2: Recognition of My Hurts

Last Friday, I went to see Dr Chan right after my lunch with Clara, Yan and Asta. He asked me how I had felt in the past few days. Well, the feelings are awkward. I can feel my eyes are enlarged outside but very tired inside. Sometimes, I feel scared and my head is stuck and can hardly think.

When he asked about how I feel about mom, I felt like I was about to cry. Tears almost fell down! He said that now that I am an adult, I can be free from her influence. I can fly high and pursue my own life. But the only thing is that I have to recognise all the hurts caused by mom. It's vague. I just don't know how. He said that it's unhealthy to be stuck in the middle of anger, guilt and forgiveness. I can forgive her but it doesn't mean that she hasn't done anything wrong to me. I have to admit that she DOES hurt me. I just feel very tired when thinking about all these past horrible scenes. Dear Lord, can YOU help me find a way out? He spent quite a long time talking with me and told me to come back with answers next time...he said I need to find a fulcrum to help me vent my feelings. (Either honey or him!!!)

When I came out, I saw a long queue waiting! I did feel better after talking to him because I don't have to pretend to be strong anymore. I can just be myself inside the room.